Cole Grows 35 - Muscle Blimp Toys
Joe had been forgotten for the moment. Sky gasped when he noticed the grunting man. Joe was stretched out across the floor grunting and groaning. He looked as if he was trying to hulk out of the skin tight dry suit. His soaking wet suit squeaked against the floor as he tried to roll over to get up only to slip and fail,dropping back with a moan. To Joe his shoulders suddenly felt six feet wide as if he had a fence post shoved under the tightening dry suit making it just that much harder to move naturally. His moans and grunts sounded to his audience as if he was enjoying the craziness a bit too much. Joe reached out an extremely jacked arm for the side of the boat, trying to sit up so he could see what had happened to Lon.
Sky’s shock melted into laughter. “You both got inflatable suits on! What a couple of clowns.” Cole and Joe both glanced up at Sky who was filming it all with his phone as he poked a toe into the clumsy man's swollen thigh as if expecting him to feel like a balloon.
Joe grunted, “I don’t feel so good”, as he failed again and bounced down on his thickening back. Joe’s muscles were fighting for room under the thick suit, blistering its surface as if it was some heavy-duty shrink-wrap. “Cole this pump is going crazy.” He hissed. “I got to get out of this suit.”
There was a bumping and scratching against the side of the boat just then. Cole stepped over Joe and looked over the side. Sky lowered his phone and reached down to help Joe to his feet.
Lon was floating face down. “I can’t roll over. What the fuck is going on?” He was twisting his bull neck as far as he could but still could barely see Cole. He was floating so high in the water his chin barely dipped into the cold lake as he bobbed up and down with the waves.
Cole said, “Force your legs down under the water. It should pull you upright. Grab hold of the ladder.”
Sky forgot Joe in his haste not to miss any of the wild action. The simple man slipped on the wet floor and slid back down on his wide back as Sky stepped over him, holding his phone out filming his floating housemate. “You’re blowing up like a balloon, big guy. No such thing as too much muscle, right?” He laughed. “This is some crazy shit. Wait till the others see you two fuck-twits!”
Lon forced his head up as if he had forgotten Skylar was in the boat. He then pushed his legs under the surface. It took a couple tries but he used his strength to force them under. Cole’s coaching was right. The move seemed to shift the pressure in his mega-muscled body somehow. Suddenly his upper body rose up and sat back down in the water with a splash. Lon was righted with his head up. The big man lost his tentative hold on the ladder as he bobbed like a cork with a splash. The new position made the pressure grow in his arms and upper body. He’d never had as crazy a pump as this. He really felt blown up with air. The nervous man was looking down at his upper body as he felt it growing around him. He could actually see his muscles growing! The wild pumps were one thing: feeling your muscles tighten and your hands go numb, maybe some stiffness and clumsy movements but this was something else entirely. He could see and feel his upper body ballooning up like somebody had stuck an air hose down his throat. He felt like a human balloon. Lon would steal nervous looks at Cole but was at a loss for words. Sky standing next to his coach filming his transformation made it hard to talk freely. Not only had his upper body been gripped by some hyper bloat but something was going on with his legs under the water. Lon wasn't sure what. He could feel a tightening of the muscles but a relief too. He could move his legs more easily the longer he floated. Soon they almost felt normal. He glanced up at his coach, “What’s happening to me?” He cried in a more than nervous tone.
The wail brought a laugh from Sky who thought the goofy pair were just pranking like normal. The pair were well known for their mugging and bullshit; especially since their transformation into muscle gods. “You’ve been bragging about your serious growth cycle, I guess you’ve just ramped it up to extremes.” He laughed as he enjoyed the show. He stole a look over his shoulder at Joe trying to pull himself to his feet by climbing up on the back bench. He made little progress as he slapped his overblown arms unable to grab on to anything. Skylar had forgotten how much fun the two fuck ups could be when they got going. This muscle suit prank was epic!
Lon tried to reach down to feel his thigh but his arm was too buoyant to force below the surface now. The longer he floated beside the boat the higher he seemed to rise out of the water. The waves were now lapping around his abdomen, several inches below his pecs. Seconds before the water line had been lapping half way down his pecs. Not only that his shoulders felt wide as hell and his upper body must have been damn near as thick. It felt like he was morphing into some sort of muscle bound island. His head was becoming isolated among a mass of swelling mounds. Lon was having trouble making sense of anything. A fear hit him that he was somehow soaking up water like a human sponge, blowing his muscles up like water balloons. But if that was the case he should be sinking lower in the water not rising higher! Logic told him that wasn’t happening. The big man felt dizzy as he bobbed helplessly. He almost felt as if his head was sinking into the ballooning mass of his upper body as he bobbed in the water. His bull neck was settling in to the growing mass and soon his chest was rubbing against his stubble covered chin. His thick chin was soon resting solidly in the V between his wildly swollen pecs. He felt as if his head might be sucked into all this swollen muscle if something didn't stop this bloating. “Get me out of here.” He held a hand out to Cole but had floated too far away now. Cole grabbed a long pole with a hook on the end and caught his plaything under the arm. He pulled and guided the human pool toy along the side of the boat toward the ladder.
Luke swam up and handed his skis to Sky as Lon climbed the ladder. “You alright, big guy?” He asked Lon but the nervous man didn’t reply.
The pressure dropped dramatically with each awkward step of the ladder as the air shifted down his body. Lon gave Joe a shove with his foot as he stepped into the boat. “Move.” Sky reached down to finally help Joe to his feet as he grunted. The two men now looked like they easily had a hundred pounds or more on Cole or Luke. Their cold water suits were blistered with swollen muscle. Their heavy arms hung stiffly at their sides pushed out by wide backs. They moved stiffly as the clueless Sky stepped up with a towel and started to wipe Lon down. “Damn, toweling you off now that you got so big reminds me of getting my show steers ready to compete at the county fair”, the country boy joked. “You two are hulking out like a couple of bulls. Keep this up and you will look like human versions of those Belgian Blues that don’t have any myostatin in their systems so there muscles grow without any stopping.” The happy man laughed at the image of his pals swelled up like the hyper muscled bulls as he turned and spit a stream of tobacco juice into the lake before going back to rubbing down the flustered stud.
Sky’s intended comic comment had a startling effect on the two muscle obsessed men. Lon and Joe’s eyes looked about as big as their muscles as they struggled to make sense of what was happening to their bodies. Both wondered if Sky’s description might have some truth to it. Lon looked at Cole, “What’s going on with us? That pump aid is fucked up. Look at me!”
Luke had swam after Lon’s skis and now was handing them up to Sky who was still laughing about the turn of events. Sky laid the skis down and turned to the three tense men, “So where’d you get them inflatable muscle suits? That is some crazy shit.”
Luke climbed into the boat with more water raining in and pooling on the fiberglass floor before it ran out of drain slots in the back of the boat. The boat settled even lower into the water under the weight of five big men. The four bodybuilders ignored Sky as they looked at one another. Cole said, “The sup didn’t do this with me or Luke. You guys look like blimps.” He laid a hand on Joe’s shrink-wrapped right pec blistering the thick rubber. “You still pumping up?”
Joe grunted without words and eyes full of fear. Cole could feel his pec growing and his suit was giving off stretching noises. Joe said, “I have to get out of this suit. It’s crushing me.”
Sky jumped in to the conversation again as he too started poking bloated muscles and slipping into the center of the group for a closer look. “You guys look like Batman and Robin in those dive suits. Well hyper muscled Batman and Robin. Is that what this is, some kind of inflatable superhero ski gear?”
Lon sounded testy now as he pushed the man toweling him off aside, “I’m telling you, it’s that fucked up pump aid doing this. We were fine till you gave us that!”
"Gave them what?" Sky asked with a dopey grin. He was dying to get brought up to speed. “These muscle suits belong to you and Luke?”
Cole ignored their old friend. He looked at Lon with a serious look, “I’m sure your double dosing had nothing to do with it either.”
Joe and Lon’s eyes met as if they had just received the worse possible news. “You…you…got to get a hold of somebody…call somebody who will know what to do. There has to be something we can take to deactivate this or counteract it.”
Cole said, “Just calm down,” as he picked up his phone from a cubby hole in the dash. He swiped his smart phone shutting down their inflation as he handed the phone to Luke. “They are right, maybe you better call your buddy. He’ll know what to do.” It was all he could do not to grin at the big mechanic. Luke took the phone and walked up to the front of the rocking boat where it was quieter and made a make believe phone call.
There was a lot of noise in the seating area at the back of the boat. The squeal of the neoprene covered feet on the wet plastic floor, Joe’s grunting, Sky’s chuckling and ignored chatter as he tried to get up to speed, and the tortured sounds of over filled neoprene.
“Just relax, Luke will find out what to do.” Cole said as he handed out fresh beers.
“So come on guys, what is this? Some pranking to liven up the party? Those inflatable suits must have cost a fortune. They look so fucking real.”
“They are real”, Lon barked with a nervous tone. “I mean it’s no muscle suit, bro. It’s us.” He slowly sat down on a bench across the back of the boat. The move made him look even bigger as his muscles bunched up and squeezed in around his head as he leaned forward and rested his forearms on his thighs. Finally as if he had no other choice of action, Lon popped open the beer.
Skylar hooted, “Yeah, right. Nobody is going to fall for that but you guys should get Oscars for the effort. This is awesome! Seriously, what is this really? I won’t let on with the others. I can play along too like your muscles just started blowing up. You can trust me. This is going to be classic!”
Joe started into the story of their transformation and supplementation. Cole interrupted, “Joe it’s supposed to be secret. Especially now, if there is a problem. We could get in trouble for sharing this stuff with you guys! Luke and I were the only ones cleared for the trials. If it turns out that the stuff is fucked up somehow there could be hell to pay. How many other people have you told?”
“Nobody… but this is Skylar! We can trust him besides he’s seen what’s happening. It’s not like we can pretend this isn't happening!” Joe barked testily.
Lon grunted, "Hell, I think everybody here is going notice this!" He threw his over muscled arms wide as he leaned back into the seat before drowning his fears with more beer.
Cole looked at Skylar as if he was debating what to do. “Ok but you have to keep this a secret. Nobody can hear the truth.”
Sky seemed suspicious as he said, “Sure…whatever you say. So what are you guys talking about? I want to know.”
The three of them launched into the ‘story’ of Lon and Joe’s transformation. Lon and Joe talked over top of one another as if racing to fill Sky in on as many details as they could, capping the story off with the rapid effects that had hit since leaving shore. As they talked from time to time Luke’s voice could be heard. “So it is probably just a short term side effect…yeah, yeah…rest and plenty of water…” The whole boat fell silent when he said, “But here’s the thing. These guys have been double dosing on the program for weeks… even the protein maximizer. They both took two pellets maybe a week or ten days apart…yeah ok…You sure?...That bad huh?”
Skylar broke in, “So you’re telling me this is real? Their muscles are really swelling up like that under them dive suits…like balloons?” He spit another stream of tobacco into the lake as if dazed by the revelation.
Cole nodded but then his face brightened as if he was just hit with a great idea. “But I think Sky’s on to something here. You guys should just act like you are wearing some crazy assed inflatable muscle suits for shits and giggles. It’s a perfect cover, see what I mean? Till we get things figured out and shrink you back to normal.”
Sky added, “Well I was sure that was what you were doing but shouldn’t we get them to a hospital or a doctor or something?” His tone had changed as he looked at the two neoprene coated muscle freaks. Sky was dead serious now.
“Luke will find out if we need to take them. His buddy at the testing lab will know what to do but the local hospital won’t know shit about this. You’d just lay there for a day or two while they look into the Program and try to figure it out before they try to treat you. By then you might be back to normal. If you need that kind of treatment Luke’s buddy will probably have you come to their labs. Besides you want this to come out in the press? I can just imagine how it would be spun if we showed up at the hospital. They would try to make you poster boys for muscle building supplements abuse.”
Joe and Lon both seemed skeptical. Lon grunted, “Sounds like a lot of maybes.” Joe said as he eased his bulk down to sit on the side of the boat, “I was hoping to get out of these dive suits. It feel like I’m pumping up in a full body cast or…or like a car tire…or something.”
Cole said, “I doubt that will happen until you shrink down a bit. Those zippers have to be under so much pressure right now.” He stepped behind Joe and tried to open the heavy zipper across his shoulders. There had been slack in the area when the zipper was closed. Now the whole area was blistered with swollen muscle. The zipper was covered in a tight roll of material and took some effort to uncover. Cole’s efforts bounced and jerked the man around. Sky stepped up to help as both men tried to uncover the clasp. Joe’s hulking back was torturing the zipper and pulled the material tight as skin. His swollen traps forced deep dips in the metal track in several places. Sky gave Lon’s a try after the freed Joe’s clasp but the zipper down the center of his back but fared no better. He tugged until his fingers hurt but the heavy zipper didn’t budge. For now the guys were stuck inside the cold water suits.
“Just cut the suits off.” Lon demanded.
Cole said, “Dude, Luke borrowed these from his pals. You got a spare couple thousand lying around to replace them with? These were custom made. Captain Spandex already ruined one of their vests.”
Lon countered, “They are probably going to pop anyway, the way we are pumping up.”
To prove him wrong, Cole grabbed a pinch of his suit and pulled. The material stretched out several inches before snapping back when released. “There’s still plenty of give, besides walking around in a Speedo with your tats showing is going to make the muscle suit ploy a hard sell. For another thing these suits might just be only thing holding it all in and keeping you from blowing up like a lard assed beach ball.”
That comment brought a shared worried look between the roommates. Joe added with despondent tone, “He’s right, Lon. We’re fucked.” Just then his stomach growled loud enough for all to hear. He turned his large eyes on Sky. “Can you get me that cooler. I’m starving.”
Lon was testy and wanted somebody to blame this all on. He grabbed piece of cold chicken from the cooler as Joe bit into another. “That fucked up pump aid is probably why we are so hungry today too!”
Cole shrugged his shoulders, “You’ve been eating non-stop since you got here. You just took that pump aid thirty minutes ago.”
Lon began to soften his resistance. “So how is this muscle suit bullshit going to fool anybody? I mean we are spontaneously pumping up. It’s not like we have hoses hooked up to an air tank. If that pumps aid hits again we are going to blow up in front of everybody.”
Joe joined in as if Lon’s comment brought up a whole new set of troubles. “Yeah, cause if it’s these custom made ski suits that are blowing up, then why do you guys look normal? They will expect you guys to do it too.”
Sky jumped in, “Ok…ok… so here’s the thing: the muscle suits they wear under the ski gear inflate automatically through a concealed pump that looks like a belly button. Problem is you two didn’t realize when you put on the dive over top the inflatable gear that the tight suits would activate the controls on your bellies just moving around. See! Now that jerking around on skis make you blow up like muscle freaks, you can’t make them deflate cause the controls are trapped under all that rubber. If your supplements make you pump up more, just play it off like the tight neoprene turned the pumps on again… if that hyper muscle pumps relaxes, well then…you are getting control back and hopefully you will shrink enough to get out of the suits. Then just act like it was just for fun.” Sky grinned, happy to help as best he could. “So what do you think?”
Cole rocked his head. “Makes about as much sense as anything.”
Sky laughed, “Perfect sense actually. Just like something these dumb fucks would do. I mean think about it! Remember when they threw the firecrackers down the trash chute in Sophie’s sorority to scare everybody and started the fire?” The memory drew laughs and moans as the four plotted over beers.
Lon belched and tossed his empty beer can aside as he held his arm out for another. His other hand dropped into the bucket of chicken beside him. “Ok, no need to go there…”
As they debated their options and past fuck-ups, Luke stepped up with the phone in his hand. “Well we got good news and bad news. Roger said that it shouldn’t be too serious. That you should rest and drink a lot of water to flush your systems out. He thought in a day or two you should be back to normal. But when I told him about the double dosing he said that it could be weeks as long as you have been heavy supping before you are back to normal. He recommended staying on regular doses though as quitting cold turkey had other problems. Oh…and he said to lay off the pump aid until you were back to normal.”
“So except for these crazy pumps, we are ok?”
“Sounds like it. He told me that they ran tests on lab rats where they gave them crazy amounts of the stuff for months at a time with no long term side effects beyond them blowing up to the size of little roided up, Chihuahuas sized Bull Mastiffs with the mobility of basketballs.”
“So when he said weeks…what did he mean by weeks? We’re just gonna look like we gained a hundred pounds this morning for the next few weeks?” Lon’s voice sounded as if he hoped that might be the worst of it. He hardly got the words out before he felt that heavy trembling he got lately when he trained hard or the odd pumps hit. Today it felt as if he had a diesel engine rumbling in his chest. His eyes shifted to Joe immediately. One look at his best friend’s worried face was all he needed to know that the odd sensations were hitting Joe too. He patted his thick chest and burped loud hoping it would stop. He grunted, “Oh fuck.”
The sounds of their stretching cold water suits could be heard by all as the men started to grow again, Luke answered his question. “No, he said at first you would be hit with random pumps like normal only they would be more extreme. As saturated as your systems are and without knowing exactly how much of the Program supplements you have taken; he said he could only speculate at how much you might grow. He said in the tests some of the rats tripled in size… a few alpha males types grew over four or five times in size.”
The two men were dazed by the news. They stared at their mechanic idol as if he said the side effects included a sudden sex change. Joe stammered, “We could end up like twenty-four feet tall?” He had a sound of panic in his voice.
Luke snorted, “No you will stay the same height. The supps aren’t taken in by your skeletal structure, it just affects soft tissue…your muscles, skin, organs and such.”
Joe said quietly, “Our cocks?” He had been tugging at the suit around his huge bulge ever since he had sat on the edge of the boat. The two freaks had pumped up everywhere and their cock bulges were as prominent as any other bulges straining their suits. Luke just shifted his eyes with a slight grin. There was no missing the pair’s huge packages as they sat gnawing on the chicken bones with arms as big as the legs of the others beside them. The tight suits accentuated their huge packages. Joe’s cock worries had continued to plague him. He often cornered Cole to pepper him with innuendo filled comments and questions about his every growing junk. Cole had fun blowing his junk up just to torture the guy. As often as not he tightened the crotch of his pants when he got close to him on campus or gym, rather than give his muscles a secret pumping. For his part Lon liked to pretend he had always been hung like a bull whenever Joe came by with his worries. He played it off as tightness in certain areas of his pants had been a lifelong problem and that he hadn’t notice any change since starting the Program.
Luke continued, “He said you might get some relief by just soaking in the cool lake. It might slow down the reactions.”
Lon growled, “Well fucking fantastic!” He tossed his stripped clean chicken bone into the cooler. “More time in the ice water. Hey promise to chip a hole in the ice for us to breathe through when night comes. Maybe you can get straws for us to breathe through and just let it freeze solid over us.”
There was laughter and catcalls from the beach. Then a chant could be heard, “We want a ski show. We want a water show.” There were calls of “Jump, Jump, Jump…” thrown in too. The chants grew louder and louder until it was easily heard as the partying crowd acted as if they had come to be entertained.
“Well what do you want to do?” Cole asked as they stood watching Lon and Cole slowly blowing up bigger and bigger. Their suits made funny noises as they panted and complained, hoping their once loved pumps would slow down if not stop all together.
Lon bent forward and stuck his ass out. “I want to fart so hard it creates a sonic boom and shrink back to normal. That’s what I want to do.” Sky laughed loud at the imagery. Joe had a troubled look on his face as if the whole situation was a bit too much for the happy guy to wrap his head around. He seemed dazed as he felt his body growing bigger by the second. He turned to Luke, “You said soaking in cool water might help?”
“Yeah, they said it might slow down the reaction and reduce the swelling.”
“Then maybe we ought to try that but out here behind the jump, so the others can’t see. Maybe we can get back to normal before we go back into shore.”
Lon looked disappointed but reluctantly agreed. Luke took an anchor and dropped it to the bed of the lake with two ropes off it. Lon snatched a neoprene hood from the box of loaned gloves and dive socks. He raised his arms to pull it over his head but his over muscled arms and shoulders got in the way. His bulging muscles now pressed against one another restricting his range of movement. The tight suit didn’t help matters. Cole stepped up and helped him up. He pulled the hood down over his head and adjusted it until his thick lipped scruffy face appeared through the opening. Lon pulled on gloves as Luke tied one rope to his right arm and the other to Joe’s.
Joe took to the ladder as he eased back into the lake. Lon looked grouchy but sat on the side of the boat for a second before plunging into the water backward. He hit with a big splash and bobbed stretched out on his back. Joe looked over and saw him best friend and dropped backward off the ladder. The two freaks floated high in the water on their backs as they were tethered by one arm to an unseen anchor. Their suits were packed with swollen mounds approximating muscles as if being completely ripped at over 400 pounds and floating like a pool toy was natural.
Luke was at the control of the boat. “You guys ok down there?”
Lon gave a despondent, “Yeah” but Joe managed to sound a bit more upbeat. “Sure. Go have some fun, just don’t forget us when you go to shore.”
Lon barked, “Hey hand me down some chicken before you go. I got to feed the beast.” He slapped his bloat belly. The others looked down at him as he pointed toward his chest. “Pile it here.” The two pneumatic muscle pool toys were floated on thickened backs until the back of their heads bare touched the water. Their chests were well above the waterline. Sky grabbed the bucket of chicken and reach down dropping a few pieces on his red camo coated chest, letting the meat rest between his swollen pecs. “More…I’m still hungry.” When Lon talked or bit into the fried chicken it looked as if he was flexing the thickened muscles in his face. His chiseled features poking out of the hole in the neoprene hood only heightened the effect as he barked orders.
Sky laughed, “Well you have to eat to grow right.”
“Fewer clichés, more chicken.” He patted his chest by his stash as he bit into a breast piece. Joe reached out for the ladder. “Me too.” For his part, Lon seemed to have an extra mound blistering his suit as his unfillable muscle gut seemed to be swelling up like the rest of his body. His quilted ball gut made a bowl for his food as it nuzzled under his equally blown up pecs.
By the time the boat pulled away the floaters had huge piles of fried chicken resting on their swollen torsos as they floated and ate. Fish began to appear around them, breaking the surface to swallow pieces of the crusty coating of the chicken that fell into the water as the muscle blimps floated while stuffing their faces. Joe and Lon were oblivious to the feeding frenzy erupting around them. It looked like the water was beginning to boil. The three men watching had to chuckle as Luke looked over at Cole with a grin and mumbled, “That out of control muscle suit excuse is sort of ironic, isn’t it?” Cole just shrugged his shoulders and smiled as they headed to the middle of the lake while Sky got ready for a turn skiing.
Lon and Joe floated as they tried to satisfy their undying hunger. For a while they bobbed in silence. Just the crunch of chicken and the distant sounds of the boat and crowd partying on shore interrupting their solitude. The nearby splashing of the feeding fish might have caught the boy’s attention from time to time but their swollen bodies blocked any of their quick investigations. Joe finally said with a mouth full, “I think my pump died.”
Lon grunted as he gnawed on another piece of chicken.
Joe added, "I think maybe I'm shrinking a little too. Maybe this soaking helps." The two helpless men were hooked together by their anchor lines so would float into one another from time to time then drift apart again before the ropes tied to their wrists would grow taunt. Then they would start to drift back toward one another again. Joe asked, “You shrinking any?”
Lon burped loud and tossed a stripped bone away with a plunk as it landed in the lake. “I don’t know.” He belched again. “All I know is I never felt so hungry. It’s like I can’t get filled up.”
“Well maybe you can’t. Maybe your gut is as elastic as the rest of you so it keeps growing the more you eat. Did you ever think of that?”
Lon thought for a moment. Joe might have a point. “Maybe so.” It was surprising when the simple guy occasionally came up with some insight but then even a broken clock was right sometimes. Lon belched again and looked over at his swollen buddy. “Don’t you think it’s funny how we caught Cole all blown up in that inflatable muscle suit during the blizzard and now we got these fucked up out of control muscle pumps and we’re are supposed to pretend it some overblown muscle suits, we can’t control?”
Joe ate for a while as he thought. “Well actually I thought it was funnier when we caught Cole all blown up like that barely able to move…and when we fucked with him. That was pretty funny. I don’t think this is funny at all. I’m kind of scared shitless, Lon…to be honest. I mean what if this is like permanent…like maybe these muscle pumps don’t wear off or maybe we just keep getting bigger and bigger like some kind of circus freaks? What if it gets so bad we swell up like thousand pound muscle monsters like those fat guys who can’t get out of their bathrooms.” Joe shuddered as he strained to look at his best friend floating a couple yards away as he shared his fears only Lon could understand. “I don’t think there is anything remotely funny about this Lon. We shouldn’t have gotten greedy about growing and getting bigger than Cole. We really fucked up big time.”
Lon grunted, “Don’t be a dumb ass, that’s not what I meant. I just meant “funny’ like odd not funny, like a joke. Geez, Joe.”
Joe felt his cheeks blush and said, “Oh.” He didn’t know why Lon always had to talk down to him like he was stupid or something. “I guess so.” They floated in silence again.
Lon thought maybe he should quit eating for a while. Joe was right; he probably wouldn’t feel full until they got back to normal. He still had six or seven pieces of fried chicken on his chest. Maybe he should just fight the cravings. He had already made a good dent into the stash of food he had brought for his long awaited binge. If he kept eating like he had, the food might not last until night let alone two days. He bobbed in the water hoping to feel the lessening of pressure that Joe had claimed. He still felt blown up as tight as a basketball. He also felt a rumbling in his gut. A hunger pang and not the nervous belly feeling that accompanied the extreme muscle bloats of the Program. His belly quivered as if it had been days since his last meal. He bobbed with the waves. Then his willpower crumbled. Lon bit into another piece of juicy chicken. “What I meant was isn’t it funny how Cole was fucking around in that muscle suit and now we look like we are, too. Did you ever tell anybody about that night and his fucked up suit with the hoses in the suit’s belly button and ass?”
“No, he asked us not to. I forgot about it till now. We drank a lot those couple of days everything was shut down by the blizzard. It isn’t all that clear except for my hangover. Sky said I called him in the middle night that night of the snow storm. He said I was slurring on about what a big bodybuilding stud Cole was or something. He starting give me shit about earlier when they got here today. I keep thinking he made it up cause I sure don’t remember calling anybody; especially to tell them that Cole is into bodybuilding.” Joe bobbed on his back nibbling at the chicken for a minute in silence. “You didn’t tell anybody about Cole’s suit did you?”
“No, it was too weird. Nobody would believe it. Everybody thinks Cole is such a stud. There was something really strange going on that night. I have no doubts he never wanted anybody else to now about his suit - ever. Like he gets off by blowing up in the thing or something. I guarantee though if everybody starts riding us about this too hard, they will all hear about Cole’s secret.” They floated and ate for a few minutes. Just then there was the approaching roar of the boat engine. It sounded as if they were about to be run over. The blimps jumped and craned bull-like necks as they tried to look toward the sounds. The human buoys just bounced and jerked at the lines as they paddled for a better view. Just then the boat shot past. The line was taunted, stretched out above them. Then sounds of skies on plywood as Cole shot up the ramp and flew into the air with a hoot. There was loud clapping and cheers drowning out the music from shore. Then the wake of the boat hit, bouncing them up and down as waves rolled out. Both men clung to the food piled on their chests but even their best efforts were too feeble to save it all. They seemed to rock with the waves for some time.
When things finally calmed down again, Lon said, “You remember Cole said he would get revenge for us ruining his muscle suit and fucking with him that night?” Lon laughed, “We spoiled his birthday. How fucked up is that? Putting on an inflatable suit and getting drunk alone?” He laughed again. “You think Cole is behind these extreme muscle pumps…you know like his payback for his birthday?”
Joe snorted, “Oh hell no. Cole is just as worried as we are. You saw him. I spend more time talking to him and he was serious about helping us get in shape. If you weren’t always acting like a smart ass around him, you would notice how he wanted this for us as much as we did. He’s been trying to make up for kicking your sorry ass, is all. You’re too stupid to notice. Besides we are the ones who fucked this up by bingeing on the supps. Cole didn’t have anything to do with that. So how is this payback?”
“Take it easy,” Lon said with a chuckle to his voice, “Calm down, he’s my friend too. You get all defensive every time I mention Cole. I know you got a stiff one for him. That’s a given by now so you don’t need to prove anything to me. I’m surprised you don’t have your walls covered with autographed pictures of the guy. I was just wondering if he was behind this somehow…blowing us up.”
“Screw you. Why you got to be like that? Always putting people down and making your comments. Getting your little digs in, like a jealous bitch.”
“Damn. I could get more stimulating conversation out of a brick wall. They’re not quite as dense as you.” Lon looked over at his bloated friend bobbing beside him. He snorted. He liked getting under Joe’s skin but it was so easy sometimes. “I just call them like I see them and this seems kind of fishy to me. That’s all I’m saying.”
“What, so you think Cole is sneaking in blowing us up somehow? Maybe slipping into the house late at night to shove air hoses in our asses to pump us up while we sleep? Remember this isn’t any muscle suit; our bodies are swelling up!” He slapped his chest with a thud. “Give me a break.” It was Joe’s turn to snort and deride Lon.
“I’m just saying it all seems odd. I have no idea what is going on but it just seems odd. Cole made threats about revenge for weeks, then nothing. Now it looks like we are going to spend the weekend blowing up like human balloon men in front of everybody. Doesn’t that sound like a sweet revenge to you? Forget all the how’s and whys. Doesn’t it seem a bit funny?” Lon gave another bone a toss. The boat roared close and then Cole was launched into the air again, yelping loudly as water dripped down on them as he sailed through the air with his legs wide before landing with a splash. Lon caught Joe watching his idol with an odd look to his face. He realized he was breaking through Joe’s denials and idol worship.
Lon continued on his line of thought. “I think we should go along with this like nothing odd is happening.”
Joe snipped, “I think it’s a little late for that. Look at me! I’m blown up like a roided Michelin Man and so are you. I don’t think anybody is going to believe this is in anyway normal.”
“No listen hard here Einstein. I’m saying, we act like everything is great. These misfiring inflatable muscle suits are fun as hell. A prank we planned that just got sweeter. We couldn’t be happier with our prank getting fucked up. We always wanted to be freaks now we really are. Mug for the fans and play it up. See, if Cole is behind this somehow he wants us all panicked and freaked out. I’m saying we go along with the malfunctioning suit excuse and run with it, like it’s all good. Then in private with Cole we act like these crazy assed muscle pumps are fucking awesome. He has already assured us there is no real danger and that it might last for a while. It all sounds kind of pat. I say we don’t give into him at all, cause that’s what he wants. I say we take this and run with it. If we pump up bigger we act like it is the greatest thing ever. As the day goes by we decide we like being complete freaks like we got used to it. Eventually Cole will have to admit that he is behind it all…see. We are too smart for him. The plan is not to give him a moment’s satisfaction.” Lon could see from Joe’s expression that he was thinking hard.
“So you don’t think this is serious?”
“Nope, the more I think about it, the more convinced I am that Cole is behind this somehow. You just follow my lead.” The roommates bobbed in the water, chowing down on fried chicken and comparing notes on the situation. Soon even Joe was coming up with comments or actions of Cole’s that fed into the conspiracy theory. All the while Cole and Luke took turns leaping over the pair as both showed off their serious water skiing skills. They even got the less experienced Sky to jump. His first try had him overcompensating on the rope killing his momentum as he hit the ramp. He was jerked off his skis when the slack was taken up and launched off the end of the ramp lying flat. A few other tries had the novice taking to the air and landing with more grace if not anywhere near the heights and showmanship of Luke and Cole.
Finally the boat slowed nearby. Cole yelled, “How you doing over there?”
The two pneumatic freaks yelled back, “Fine.” They had finished their chicken snacks and were just floated side by side as if the current situation wasn’t any less normal than enjoying the sun on a pair of air mats…only Lon and Joe were now blown up like human air mats. Both had their arms resting on their bellies and Joe had crossed his ankles. Their thick backs and blown up asses held their muscled waists out of the water, creating a bridge between their upper and lower bodies.
Sky went back to snapping pictures as Cole used the pole to reach out and snag their anchor rope. Cole called out, “You ready to go in and warm up by the fire?” He pulled the anchor off the lake bottom.
Lon added, “Sounds good.”
Cole was taken aback by their laid back moods. Lon wasn’t even bitching about the cold anymore. He and Luke exchanged a grin. “Did the cold soak help with the swelling?” Luke asked.
Joe said, “I think so”, in his perennially optimistic tone. He gave Lon a smirk that Cole noticed.
Cole took the rope out of the hook on the pole. He took the small anchor off the line but instead of pulling the blimps in, he tied the rope off on a chrome hook on the back of the boat. He gave a wave to Sky at the controls.
The engine revved up and the ropes to their wrists grew tight. Lon and Joe’s heads jerked up as the called out, “Hey, what are you doing?” Knock it off.” Their exclamations were ignored as the boat took off and they skidded across the water by one arm. Through the splash and waves they could see Luke and Cole laughing as the trio took the blimps body surfing.
Lon caught the rope with his free hand and pulled, rolling his body over. By holding onto the rope he was able to pull his head out of the water and ride a crest of a wave with his broad shoulders and chest rising out of the water. Joe still skidded back and forth on his back by one arm with a fan of water spraying off his shoulders and raining down over his head as he yelled and sputtered. Lon yelled advice until Joe too had rolled over and held the rope in both hands gaining some control as they were pulled by the boat.
There was a wave of cheers and laughter as they appeared from behind the ramp with the two helpless muscle blimps. The crowd laughed and enjoyed the show as the boat circled the jump out in front of the beach again and again. “I wondered where Joe and Lon had disappeared to.” Someone yelled. “Now a tubing show.” Another voice said, “I don’t think they’re tubing. Looks like they blew up their dive suits.” The crowd laughed and cheered as things became clearer as the ever faster flying freaks skidded around the lake yelling. “Damn, look at those chests and arms! I wonder what happened to them.” One joked. “Looks like they gained a little weight”, came a reply. All enjoyed the effort and buzzed about this being another classic crazy stunt from the trio of buddies just to kick off the wild weekend.
Then the boat turned and headed toward shore. The laughter and cheers grew and then fell into nervous titters as it looked as if Luke was going beach the boat into the crowd. The group cheered when the boat veered off for another circle of the jump ramp. Lon and Joe were hooting as it felt as if they hit top speed. Then the ropes went slack as they saw Cole laughing as he released the rope from the boat.
Lon and Joe were free now skidding across the lake’s surface like stones. The pair yelled as their swollen chests slapped into the surface. They were heading straight toward the cheering group on the beach. Everything was happening so fast. The helpless blimps feared they would end up plowing face first into the sandy beach. Their friends on the beach started to show signs of the same fears as they began to back and clear a path.
Just as quickly their momentum slowed as they sunk deeper and deeper into the water with each bounce. Then they were tumbling before landing in the shallow water with a splash. Lon was almost to his feet when he felt someone grab and pull him up. A couple of the guys had rolled up their jeans and run into the water to help them. Joe was coughing and sputtering as he laid sprawled out on his belly. The two hooting fans grab him and pulled him up as Lon leaned over and slapped his belly. “It’s show time, bud.”
Lon threw his shoulders back and strutted toward the beach. He thrust his swollen arms back and then stopped and flexed his ridiculous form as if he was a WWE wrestler entering the arena. Joe stepped up still sputtering with a dazed expression as he tried to wipe the sand caked to his chest off. He clear his waterlogged nostrils with a farmer blow. Then he dropped back into the shallow water with a splash washing away the reminders of his glorious entry to the show. He sprang back to his feet mugging like his best pal.
Their newly enhanced forms drew expected reactions as the others got a close up view of the wildly muscled pair. Their friends laughed and hooted as the pair showed off. One of the guys called out, “What is this supposed to be? Your version of Hans and Franz?”
Joe did a head bobbing flex as the others chuckled but Lon broke in, “No, just two muscle gods after a soak in the pool of super muscles!” He waddled toward the crowd proudly. His thighs slid over the top of one another with each step. The crowd circled them taking in their extreme pumps from all sides now as the pair mugged. Someone said, “You swallowed the air hose for real this time, Lonny.”
The spokesman for the pair replied, “No such thing as too much muscle.” Joe was popping his chest for a couple of girls but when he offered to let them feel his ridiculously blown up mounds they were reduced to giggles and backed away as if he might pop if poked too hard. Joe smiled and dropped his hyper jacked arms, “Come on babe, I won’t hurt ya.”
Lon popped his bull neck. “Meat and ale for the gods of muscle”, he called out as he lowered his bulk onto a bale of straw by the bonfire as if it was a throne. The others laughed but soon a mug of beer was shoved into his hand a fresh bucket of chicken was dropped into his lap. Joe look a seat on a neighboring bale with two beauties under each wildly muscled arm as he flirted. Lon reached up to pull his hood back to free his head but when he lacked the mobility to reach it the others laughed. Still he acted as if gaining a hundred pounds of more muscle was an everyday occurrence. One of his buddies reached out and pulled the hood back leaving it shoved down over his neck. The rippled circles of neoprene just highlighted how thick his long neck now was as the ever hungry man shoved more food in. Their friends laughed and played along with the prank, feeding and catering to the handsome pair as the party roared on.
The boaters had tied the boat up at the dock and were completely forgotten as the others flocked around Lon and Joe. They were pulling off their wets suits, letting the tops hang down from their waists as they pulled on sweat shirts watching the scene from the dock. Sky hurried over to join his wife and play his role in the scheme as he explained to the others how the comedy team were stuck inside their neoprene suits with self-inflating muscle suits underneath. The group loved it even more. Lon and Joe assured them that, “it was all good…”
Luke looked over and gave Cole’s abs a slap, “Wow your scheme seems to have them completely freaked out.” He laughed hard as the swollen pair held court.
Cole pulled his smart phone out with a smirk, “The day has just begun.”
To Be Continued